I had shared a couple emails about Transform Your Destiny by Dale Halaway over the last couple months.
This is one of the most profound books I’ve had the opportunity to work on, and Dale and I were chipping away at it for four years prior to publication
Today I want to share a summary of one of the key ideas in the book, which are the 5 Keys to Personal Transformation
Keep in mind this is just an excerpt from just one of the many insightful chapters…
The 5 Keys to Personal Transformation
When it comes to transforming ourselves, this chapter will focus on five essential keys to that process. Each key stands alone, but when you combine them, they become very powerful in transforming whatever it is you want to change inside yourself. You see, that’s where the real transformation exists. It’s on the inside—not the outside.
Key #1 – Identify It
First, you’ve got to identify the part of you that’s up for healing, for transformation, or for some kind of a resolution or an integration. You’ve got to identify it, and you’ve got to identify it correctly. One of the ways we do this is through self-inquiry. This is where we ask the types of questions that specifically take us deeper into a part of ourselves, such as: “If what I’m feeling right now was given a voice and it could speak out loud to me, what would it say?” or “If this problem that I’m currently struggling with was reflecting something back to me about me, what would it be?”
Key #2 – Connect with It
Once you’ve identified the part of yourself that is up for transformation, you have to connect with it. If you are writing down your dreams in an earnest attempt to identify the parts of yourself that are ready to transform, your dream space will know that you’re willing to connect with it, and it will start giving you more dreams. But, if you don’t habitually attempt to connect with this part of yourself, then it gets the message that it’s just not important to you.
Key #3 – Accept It
After we’ve identified and connected with this part of us, the third key is to accept it—and more specifically, to accept it exactly the way it is without condition. So, if it has three warts on it, accept all the warts. Now here’s a little golden nugget—your ego does not want you to accept it.
The ego wants you to think, “How could I possibly accept this thing, especially if it’s got a wart on it? This belongs to somebody else. We’ve got to make him pay—the one who put the wart on this part of me.” It’s looking through the lens of a lower perspective. No matter how you cut it, the ego will have a difficult time seeing this properly. Or at least until you teach it how.
Key #4 – Own It
You’ve got to step into the driver’s seat and take full responsibility for all parts of yourself. This might sound simple, and every now and then, it might be—yet there’ll be other times when this is going to challenge you to the core, if it hasn’t already. It will be a process that will likely go on for a little while, especially if you’re dealing with a part of you that you’ve been in denial of for a long time.
All the great teachers have talked about this thing called “responsi- bility.” You don’t go from zero to a hundred overnight in accepting full responsibility for a part of you and for a part of your life—if that part has been dysfunctional and caused a lot of pain over a long period of time. Because for whatever reason, you unconsciously chose to avoid taking on the responsibility for the healing of this aspect of you and/or this area of your life. This process is not going to be a quick fix.
Key #5 – Learn from It
As you’re going through the entire process of identifying it, connecting with it, accepting it, and taking ownership for it, what truly releases you in your own transformational process is when you have learned from it—and more specifically, to a point where you’ve now mastered it.
What it might look like to work with this key so it can be embodied is: while you’re going through this process, whether it’s embracing the con- sequence for a choice that was previously made, or taking responsibility for one of your issues, or transforming some part of yourself—at some point, ask the question, “If there was something I was to be learning here about myself or the way I’ve been living my life, what would that be?”
Was this helpful, did you have a realization or insight? Hit “reply” and let me know 🙂